SLOKA 154 FROM DANCING WITH SIVA
WHO WERE KADAITSWAMI AND CHELLAPPAN?
Kadaitswami was a dynamic satguru who revived Saivism in Catholic-dominated Jaffna, Sri Lanka, in the 1800s. Chellappaswami was an ardent sage, ablaze with God consciousness, immersed in divine soliloquy. Aum.
BHASHYA
Kadaitswami was a powerful siddha, standing two meters tall, whose fiery marketplace talks converted thousands back to Saivism. It is said he was a high court judge who refused to confer the death penalty and renounced his career at middle age to become a sannyasin. Directed by his satguru to be a worker of miracles, he performed siddhis that are talked about to this day–turning iron to gold, drinking molten wax, disappearing and appearing elsewhere. Chellappaswami, initiated at age nineteen, lived alone in the teradi at Nallur temple. Absorbed in the inner Self, recognizing no duality, he uttered advaitic axioms in constant refrain: ”There is no intrinsic evil. It was all finished long ago. All that is, is Truth. We know not!” The Natchintanai says, ”Laughing, Chellappan roams in Nallur’s precincts. Appearing like a man possessed, he scorns all outward show. Dark is his body; his only garment, rags. Now all my sins have gone, for he has burnt them up! Always repeating something softly to himself, he will impart the blessing of true life to anyone who ventures to come near him. And he has made a temple of my mind.” Aum Namah Sivaya.
LESSON 154 FROM LIVING WITH SIVA
STRIVING FOR TEAMWORK
The mother-in-law has much to offer. A strong, kindly mother-in-law will see that divorce does not happen for her son by helping to hold the family together. A strong, loving mother-in-law will see that an untrained wife becomes trained in various household skills and the human arts of nurturing and education. A strong, understanding mother-in-law will care for the children and give occasional rest and freedom to the busy young homemaker. The mother-in-law is a precious artifact. Whatever her qualities are, likeable or unlikeable, they are also the qualities of the son, since she raised him. She is a library of useful knowledge for the young bride. If the young homemaker takes the attitude that she is in school and the mother-in-law is her teacher, and adopts that relationship, then it will be a positive learning experience for the daughter-in-law, and she will become a better, more accomplished, more refined person as positive qualities awaken in her. The mother-in law teaches the ins and outs of the whole family, and if there are dozens of members of the extended family, there is a lot to share and know. She should listen carefully.
Many families are not patient and persistent enough to bring about harmony in the home. Often they resort to splitting apart. When the mother-in-law living with her son and daughter-in-law is not kindly, loving or understanding, one common solution that works when the going gets tough for the bride is for the son to get an apartment for himself and his wife next door to his mother and father’s home, or at least not too far away. After the first baby is born, mom-in-law may soften.
Another solution is a condominium with members of the extended family living in separate apartments in the same building. This happens in many parts of the world where ancestral compounds provide closeness, but also separateness. Within this independence enjoyed by each nuclear family, there is yet a valuable dependence on the extended family as a support in marriage, crises, births and deaths. Here, without too strict a rein, the elderly mother may reign supreme. Honor her, respect her when she visits and realize that each in turn may be a mother-in-law or father-in-law one day. Thus we set a new karmic pattern in families where Eastern values and those of the West merge for a happy elderly experience among Hindus in today’s world. With this in mind, shall our motto now be ”Old and gray and here to stay”?
Still, we must admit that to move across town to avoid the mother-in-law is to cause new karmas to be worked out in a future birth. To conquer the home situation in love and trust leads us to deepen our religious commitments through sadhana, to quell the flames of fight within us. When this is done, a better person emerges. The family dharma is a very important part of Hinduism today. We must reaffirm that we are born into a family to merge our prarabdha karmas with those of others and endeavor to work them out with all family members.
It is best to take a positive attitude. Mothers-in-law are not going to go away. They have always been with us; they will always be with us. Many, if not most, are not going to adjust to being retrained. Most will have a hard time accepting suggestions or hearing about a better way of doing things. They are who they are. If the wife receives pleasure from her husband, simultaneously she can bless his mother for bringing him into a physical body. Let’s be kindly. Let’s be tolerant. Let’s be accepting. Let’s be nice to the aged. Let’s work out issues at the daily family meeting as they come up. If all else fails and the situation becomes unbearable, let’s get an apartment a few minutes away, and treat Mom as an honored guest when she comes to visit, which will probably be twice a day.
SUTRA 154 OF THE NANDINATHA SUTRAS
NEVER BENDING TO PEER PRESSURE
Siva’s adolescent followers hold their own among their peers and are leaders. To bend to peer pressure and offend the dharma shows weakness of character and parental neglect. Nothing but shame can follow. Aum.
LESSON 154 FROM MERGING WITH SIVA
LEAVING THE ANAVA MARGA
Anava still exists in the other margas, but it diminishes. It first starts out as the ”I’ll do it all myself. I need no one to help me.” Fulfillment comes through fulfilling each individual desire. Self-preservation is a very important part of the personal ego. But then, later, as progressive steps are taken, spiritual identity fulfills the emptiness, as water fills up a container. Only at the moment that mukti occurs does the container vanish. Until then the anava is like smoldering coals in a burnt-out fire. New wood can be thrown upon them. They can be fanned up. Detractors to a spiritual movement will often try to reawaken the anava of its leader and kill out the rival movement by creating his downfall.
Anava comes strongly to the Hindu when not living up to Hindu Dharma, when not performing sadhana, when there is no desire for mukti. When he has a fatalistic view of karma, when his Sanatana Dharma does not include pilgrimage once a year, daily reading of scripture, home puja, temple worship, when he is overly involved in the acquisition of wealth, ignoring all the other goals of life–we have here the makings of a fine anava margi. Being overly involved with personal pleasures, kama, neglecting artha, not understanding karma, we have the makings of a wonderful anava margi. Being overly involved in dharma or the desire for mukti, we have here the makings of a wonderful karma yogi, bhakti yogi, raja yogi, jnana yogi. The normal Hindu needs a normal balance of all the goals. It is no accident that the Hindu sages can understand the anava within man. Yes, of course, they passed through it themselves and are just tapping their own memory patterns, seeing the actions of others and knowing the outcome.
As the soul leaves the anava marga and enters the charya path, a budding love begins to unfold. He is now conscious in the muladhara chakra, looking out through the window of memory and reason at the world around him. His personal ego, which had until recently been well placed on the anava marga, is feeling bruised. It now has to deal with some very real challenges–loving one’s country, loving the world, family, friends. The charya marga brings him into penance, which eventually brings him into sadhana, which is regulated penance. Without sadhana, penance tends to be spontaneous, erratic; whereas consistent sadhana is the regulation of penance. Now the soul begins dropping off the bonds of karma, maya and anava as it unfolds into bhakti, love. This is true Saiva Siddhanta. All this is not without being a painful process. Therefore, the protective mechanism of fear, which in itself is an avoidance process, is right there to help–in the chakra just below the muladhara. The presence or absence of spiritual surrender and willingness to serve shows whether a person is on the anava marga or on the charya marga. Devotees on the charya marga are striving to unfold spiritually and reach the kriya marga. People on the anava marga are not striving at all. They are their own self-appointed teachers and proceed at their own pace. When we are on the charya marga, we have a lot of help from family, friends and our entire religious community. When we are on the kriya marga, the entire Hindu community, the elders and others all get behind us to help us along our way. Then when we are finally on the yoga marga, we have all the shaptha rishis helping us. The satgurus are helping, too, and all three million swamis and sadhus in the world are helping us along the path at this stage. When we have entered the jnana marga, we are bringing forth new knowledge, giving forth blessings and meeting the karmas that unwind until mukti.
